Supporting all who care for elders
“I just changed his diaper. You grab a bib for me, and I will feed him.” Is this a conversation between two parents holding their newborn infant? Or perhaps two Early Childhood educators in a daycare situation? No, it’s a conversation held between two care partners over the head of a non-verbal elder in a […]
How To Use the Right Words in Eldercare Read More »
Care partner stress is real, sometimes intense and wearing. When you are in the middle of the battle, you don’t want to hear “10 Ways to Beat Caregiver Stress” because most of them don’t speak to your situation, and you already know that stuff anyway. You want to hear how to get through today. I
Lobster, Lasagna and Memories Read More »
My friend, who I will call Jane, has been going through hell as a care partner. Her husband is suffering from a serious form of brain cancer, and their lives have been one crisis after another lately. Surgery after surgery, infection, seizures and multiple hospitalizations. Each day is a roller coaster of emotions, as she tries
Dear “Friends,” How Dare You? Read More »
Few people seek out the role of care partner. Of those who do, most of them are paid to fulfil the role, and only a small portion of those feel called to the position. For the most part, the role of care partner is thrust upon family members who embrace it more or less reluctantly.
The Reluctant Care Partner Read More »
A special person I know is moving her mom into care in the next month. What a frightening journey that can be! She wrote to me, asking for advice. This was my reply: I was so pleased to hear you and your family had made the difficult decision to find a place for your mom
Advice on the Big Move to Long-Term-Care Read More »
Imagine you are 10 years old. Do you remember the house you lived in at that time? What did it look like? What did your mom and dad like to wear? Did your mom wear an apron and make your favourite foods? Was your dad busy at work all day, and did the family eat
How to Focus Your “Dementia-speak” and Produce Joy Read More »
We often associate anxiety with dementia, and that’s legitimate. There’s nothing like an impaired memory to cause fear, especially if everything and everyone is new to you every day–that’s scary. But that’s a topic for another day. Elders who don’t suffer from cognitive decline, but have an anxiety disorder, have an especially poignant struggle. I
The Crippling Force of Anxiety Read More »
Imagine you’re snuggled in bed having a great sleep, and at about 7:00 a.m., a stranger walks in your bedroom, turns on the light, and begins rifling through your clothes. As you cower under the sheets, she grabs the covers out of your hand, ripping them off you, and starts to perform some extremely personal
How To Make Your Approach Diffuse Anger Read More »
Families can be the best aspect of our lives, or the worst, or somewhere in between. The reality is that if families aren’t functioning well, or one member isn’t, becoming a care partner will make this more difficult. Rather than fighting, dysfunctional families will often stay away from each other, having as little contact as
I saw laughter. I saw whirlwinds of activity. I saw smiles and happy tears. I saw hugs and milling crowds and eating–lots of eating. I saw all these at work today. But I didn’t see helplessness. “An Elder-centred community creates opportunity to give as well as receive care. This is the antidote to helplessness.” Eden
The Family had a Party Read More »