I can’t remember what I had for sale. That’s not important to the story. I posted it on Facebook, saying that my price was firm because I would be using the money to put toward a recumbent bike for my niece. She had what we thought was Parkinson’s, and couldn’t safely walk outside, but this specially designed recumbent bike would mean she could get around on their property.
Someone messaged me and said they weren’t interested in what I had to sell, but could they contribute to the bike? Then another and another. I think I did sell the original item, but within a week, 12 people had contributed and I sent the money to my nephew to purchase the bike. I was blown away.
I couldn’t have done it on my own. In my original plan, I would send the money from what I sold, and maybe others in the family could give something. Instead, because others supported me, I was able to buy the bike.
Support is key. No one can make the journey as a caregiver alone. The final inspirational plaque from the Cancer Survivor’s Park in Ottawa gave this advice: Seek and accept support.
This week I attended by Zoom the funeral of this same niece. Her diagnosis was changed to Multiple Systems Atrophy, and as I listened to people talk about the increasing challenges she faced, I was struck by how much support the family had over the years. Certainly the medical community and those who supplied the equipment she needed, but also friends, family, the church and many others. Her caregivers. Her husband, who worked to exhaustion to help her. Her children. On and on.
No matter where you are on the caregiving journey, look for the help which is available. Google resources, ask your doctor, and inquire of other caregivers. Network. And when help is offered, receive it. Practical offers such as shovelling snow, cutting grass, cleaning the house, making a meal–anything at all. Ask and receive.
Now, our Dementia Park is looking pretty wonderful. One final aspect I would include is a children’s play area, and a paddling pool. Elders love to watch children at play. One successful program we had was called “Babies.” Moms with little ones under two would come and sit on the floor with their babies and a scattering of toys. They would play and the elders would watch, doting. It was the best!
Once a year, we took everyone to a park across the street. While the children played, we had a barbecue. I’ll never 
forget the year one of our “over 90s” rolled up her pant legs and went in the water of the paddling pool with her walker. She had a blast, and so did we.
The Dementia Park is a dream, but perhaps there are ways in which you can use the ideas to give your elder a fun afternoon.
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