“Should we celebrate mom’s birthday? I don’t even know if she understands what it’s all about. Why go to all the trouble if it doesn’t mean anything to her?”
The answer to the first question is a resounding YES!
Here’s why:
She will benefit
The “Happy Birthday” song, presents and cake go back to our earliest memories. Even the most unresponsive residents turn their head, listen, and may smile. For others, being the centre of attention is just so much fun. Most people enjoy being made to feel special.
Her neighbours will benefit
There is nothing like a party. We celebrate birthdays all the time and each one is so much fun. Even if there’s no family visiting, even if they don’t know the person, even if it comes out of the blue, the singing of “Happy Birthday” and celebrating together makes everyone happy. Residents reach out and congratulate the person celebrating, and enjoy the shared cake.
Her care partners will benefit
When you live in a neighbourhood, care partners develop relationships with residents. They care about them as people. They talk with them during care, help them dress and look good, take them to the hairdresser, encourage them to eat, know their families and care about their birthdays. When an elder has a birthday, they are excited. They want them to look especially nice, have a fun time with family and feel special. That’s part of being a care partner.
You and your family will benefit
Your elder is a part of your personal history. They may have planned birthday parties for you, and they certainly made memories with you at some point. You can probably tell many stories about them. Even if they are not able to do much for themselves or respond as they used to, they are still there and a part of who you are. Their birthday means something, and should be celebrated.
A birthday is a family affair. In our neighbourhood, we celebrate all birthdays–residents, care partners, housekeepers, nurses. Everyone who is a part of our family. (Yes, we have a lot of celebrations. That’s a good thing!) A birthday says, “The day you were born is special. You are special.”
That’s true. So celebrate!
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