Supporting all who care for elders
Maybe it’s rare these days, but I grew up with “respect your elders.” I called everyone “Mrs. Smyth” and “Mrs. Ruse,” and even when I grew up and these ladies invited me to use their first names, I couldn’t. My mother, who passed away in my mid- twenties, seemed to sit on my shoulder and […]
What Does Respect Mean, Anyway? Read More »
It was the end of a hectic day at work, and interruption after crisis after demand left me feeling like I had accomplished little. In the last hour, residents were beginning to gather for dinner, and I was taking the opportunity to achieve some of my “to do” list. I was focused and, I will
Isolation and the Power of Community Read More »
“What we had as a couple is gone. Now it’s all about coping with him and the way he acts. I still love him, but I miss normal.” I hear variations of this so often. “My mother is gone.” “I don’t recognize my brother.” “This isn’t the father I knew.” “I wish…I wish…I wish…” There’s
How to Find Normal When Normal Seems Hopeless Read More »
Why is it so hard to look after ourselves? We all know we should. We can hear our mother’s voices expounding the litany of advice we loved to ignore. “Eat your vegetables. Dress warmly when you go out in the winter. Get enough sleep. Don’t eat junk food. Exercise.” And if our mothers didn’t tell
The Tricky Business of Self-Care Read More »
How is this day unlike any other day? Those famous words were applicable to us as we celebrated Shrove Tuesday in our neighbourhood. The menu at lunch was, of course, pancakes, with sausage, bacon, peach and/or strawberry sauce and maple syrup. Resident’s eyes widened as this amazing plateful of goodies was brought to them. If
How to Offer Maximum Choice and Why Read More »
No, do more than hug. Give them the gift of your time. Today began with falling snow and baking muffins and joy. Somewhere around noon, it all fell apart. One of my residents was unresponsive and I worried that I was seeing stroke symptoms. Another with serious heart issues was unwell. We were trying to
Hug A Care Partner Today Read More »
“Nobody’s asked me how I’m doing.” The poignant words lingered in my mind long after the evening ended. I spoke to a group at church about self-care in ministry, but because I used examples from my life and work, the topic of elders in long-term care naturally rose to the surface. A lovely lady, an
“How Are You Doing?” Read More »
Words aren’t friends for George any more. He used to give lectures, make high-level phone calls, and joke with co-workers in his job as president of a company. Now words swirl in his head, and he can seldom catch the right one. His tongue stumbles and his brow furrows as he tries to tell me
Dementia: It’s Painful When Words Fail Me Read More »
Dementia. Memory loss. Alzheimer’s disease. Confusion. Cognitive impairment. Neurocognitive disorder. What does it all mean? Are these all words used to describe one condition, or are they different? Does everyone with dementia (or whatever term you use) act the same? What can I expect? When a person is diagnosed with dementia or any other term
Confessions About the Remarkable World of Dementia Read More »
“I should be able to do this.” What this well-dressed, beautiful senior lady was referring to was moving herself and her husband from the home they had lived in for most of their married years. The initial decision to move was one she had to make alone. He was no longer able to participate. All
Care Partners: The Magic of Not Trying to Do It All Read More »