What takes an elder from independent to needing care?
It might be an event, such as a fall, a stroke or other medical crisis.
It could be, like a slow leak on a tire, something that takes a while to notice. Bills aren’t being paid, conversations don’t make sense or a house isn’t clean because housework is physically too much to handle. In each case, a change is necessary and heavy decisions loom.
Here’s where the problems start. The crisis, whether overnight or slowly building, usually has some medical basis. Families scramble to find ways to ensure Mom is safe first, and then comfortable. Doctor’s appointments (and more doctor’s appointments), supports such as visiting nurses, perhaps a personal support worker for a few hours, housekeeping help, physio and perhaps a move to long-term-care are all weighty decisions. There’s nothing wrong with all this. It’s necessary and important. But it isn’t enough.
This isn’t a new rant for me. I’ve talked about the need for purpose in an elder’s life many times. But we are in the midst of a storm which has left us weary, frightened and grasping for what we deem most necessary. The rest will have to wait. The storm? COVID.
Two years ago, we saw covid-19 race through our long-term-care facilities. Residents became sick, some died. We scrambled to figure out how to keep them safe and made radical moves such as closing dining rooms and refusing access to visitors. Distressed family members in masks waved through the windows. Those who ran social activities were visiting one-on-one , but it wasn’t nearly enough.
Now we face another frightening wave. A fourth? I’ve lost track. We are vaccinated and working on boosters, but this one is so contagious and our elders are frail. Have we learned anything along the way? What should we do? And how does it affect elders in the community?
We have learned an important lesson, although we may not be sure how to apply it. Loneliness kills.
Loneliness kills.
We’ve seen it in every sector of our society. From babies born during COVID who don’t know how to socialize outside their families, to children struggling with depression as they are told, yet again, that they have to try to learn online. To adults working from home who miss the interaction with co-workers and to our elders, who experience physical and cognitive changes solely because they can’t interact with others.
COVID isn’t going away any time soon. How do we infuse social interaction and purpose into the lives of our elders in a safe and realistic way, both inside long-term-care and in the community?
Can medical and social forms of care be married and get along? Even flourish?
Stay tuned…
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