Long-Term-Care

How to Find Your New Best Friends Among the Staff

When moving someone into long-term-care, there’s so much to think about. From finding the right place to preparing your elder to making the move and getting them settled. So many details.  Is it any wonder people forget about one of the most important resources until several weeks into the experience? It’s not too late, but […]

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How to Overcome the Struggle to Let Go

Barbara sat in her car in the parking lot of her mother’s new home, staring at her hands and feeling like the worst daughter ever. About a month ago, they’d moved her mom, Hazel, into long-term-care. From the first conversation, through downsizing, the move itself and beyond, they’d worked as a family team with minimal

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Practical Tips to Prepare for the Big Move

Hazel looked around her bedroom from the proximity of her pillow. Bins and boxes lay piled in one corner, and the knowledge that she’d just had her last sleep in this room sat heavily on her chest. Not that she had strong ties to the room, but today she moved to long-term-care and she knew

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The Big Move: What Is the Most Essential Ingredient?

Hazel smiled, remembering the day she’d had a meltdown in her kitchen. Thank goodness she’d been alone. Her son had called with good news. The place they’d picked for her to live, their top choice of many, had called to say she’d been accepted and was on a waiting list. She knew the stark reality

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“Not in Kansas Any More!” How to Find Your Way In A Move to Long-Term-Care

After my husband died, my friends would often take me shopping with them. I’ve always hated shopping, but I needed companionship so I’d follow them around the stores like a lost puppy. On one of these excursions to a craft store, my friend went in search of what she needed and I wandered the aisles

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Finding Your Way in a Move to Long-Term-Care

It was time. Hazel knew it and she felt sure her family knew it. No significant conversations about the topic had occurred, but her son had asked her to dinner tonight and the rest of the family would be there. Hazel had a sense she would be the topic of conversation. She knew her kids

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Never Say Never

“I’ll never put my mother in a home.” I’ve heard these words many times over the years. They’re often said with conviction and a sanctimonious air that doesn’t invite dialogue. There are many hidden messages in these eight words, and although not all of them may be intended, some definitely are. In some cultures, it’s considered dishonourable

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The Milk Police

“We’ve got a problem.” Megan’s delightful British accent and belly laugh were my favourites, but she wasn’t laughing today. She pulled me aside with a frown and confided to me in a low tone the seriousness of what they were facing. Someone at their table for four was wasting milk. She asked for a full

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How to Love a Care Partner

Your family member has just moved into care. There is so much to do to get them settled. What will fit in the room? How should you set it up so they are comfortable? Meet the doctor and the nurses, get their clothes labelled, on and on… For some, giving over care to strangers is

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Advice on the Big Move to Long-Term-Care

A special person I know is moving her mom into care in the next month. What a frightening journey that can be! She wrote to me, asking for advice. This was my reply: I was so pleased to hear you and your family had made the difficult decision to find a place for your mom

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