Anxiety

How to Recognize Caregiver Guilt

Mary’s care partner came to me looking frustrated. “I don’t know what to do. Every drawer and cupboard and extra space is stuffed full, and today Tim came in with more presents for her. She was delighted, but I have no idea where to put them!”  I smiled. Although it was a lovely problem to […]

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How to Read and Understand When the End is Near

One day, your task as a care partner will end. You know this. Perhaps, on a day full of appointments and crises and decisions, you long for that day. In a secret place in your heart, you might think, “My elder has suffered enough and I’m tired. I’m ready for the end.” Then a nurse

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Dealing with Behaviours: When All You Want Is Sleep

Edith woke with a start.  The children needed her. She had to get them dressed for school, and make sure Jeremy washed his face and brushed his teeth after breakfast. Alice didn’t usually need reminding, but Jeremy tried to sneak out without cleaning up. She needed to make their lunches, and after they left, she

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Dealing with Behaviours: A Trip to New Brunswick, a Journey Down the Hall and a Fat Man.#wandering

Jean looked out her kitchen window to see her mother striding down the sidewalk. Although her mom had dementia, she remained physically strong and she was making tracks. She dropped her dish towel and raced out the door. “Mom!” she called. “Where are you going?” “To New Brunswick.” Her mother had grown up in that

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How to deal with a stolen purse

Gloria flounced into the dining room and announced loudly, “Someone stole my purse!”  Like a tightening belt, the agitation among the others in the room increased. We had a thief among us? Was anyone’s belongings safe? Gloria’s care partner assured her she would help look, and they went arm in arm down to her room.

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How to Find Variety in Community For Your Elder

“No.” All her life, Maggie had been in the middle of everything. A little raucous and “off the wall,” irreverent and fun, full of life. But life had almost drained from her, and as a widow, blind and in a wheelchair, she didn’t bubble as she used to. She barely simmered most days.  So when

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How Loneliness and Isolation Are Toxic for Elders

We sat on our swing on the deck. At mid-afternoon it looked like dusk. Our solar lights sprung to life and an eerie stillness descended. We wore our special glasses and watched with awe as the eclipse of 2024 slipped across the sky.  As awed as I was by the whole event, something else struck

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How to Train Your Mind to Handle Chronic Pain

I felt like a bug on the wall, hearing a private conversation which took me into the hearts and mind of people struggling with dementia. It wasn’t private, but a podcast featuring several people sharing. One elderly British lady stole my heart as she explained how she took her caring children aside. “Please don’t help

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How Creativity Opens New Worlds for Elders with Dementia

Barbara had a bad attitude her entire life, and it didn’t improve when she struggled with dementia. Snarky, sometimes mean, but also needy and wanting all the attention all the time, she’d always looked after herself. Now she couldn’t, and she wasn’t gracious about it. Even her dementia didn’t stop her from making snide remarks

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On the First Day of Christmas, Dementia Gave To Me…

The whole song leaves me wondering. Partridges are small for eating, pear trees are dormant in winter and as for the leaping lords and milking maids…forget it. (The five golden rings have possibilities, but I got a golden engagement ring in March and a golden wedding band in September, so I’m good for rings as

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